How WoW Helped me Through an Abusive 2 Year Relationship

How WoW Helped me Through an Abusive 2 Year Relationship

Jo discusses how, while she was trapped in a mentally and physically abusive relationship, WoW was the only thing that helped restore her sense of self-worth.

Life had been going well for me since I was a kid. I had great parents, a caring younger brother, I did well at school and I had a great group of friends (who I still talk to now and again). This changed when I got to college (year 11 and 12 in Australia) and I met my (now ex) boyfriend. I was a bit of a rebellious teenager but it was never very serious until him.

It started out all nice and happy, but then he started getting selfish and possessive. He’d want me to miss classes for him or wear looser clothes so other guys wouldn’t look at me. In hindsight, I know that’s all bad, but being naive about relationships I thought I wanted it. Then his dad died in year 12. Sad I know, but instead of dealing with it in a good way, he just didn’t bother and blamed everything on everyone else. He changed for the worse, having violent temper outbreaks, self-pity episodes and was always going on about “poor him,” even though he pretended to everyone else that he was fine.

Then he turned abusive - physically, mentally and emotionally. He’d think it was funny to try and make me cry, completely lose it and punch me repeatedly over some random thing he got angry about, and eventually broke my DS and then my laptop.

I felt absolutely alone. I didn’t want to tell anyone; not my parents, not my brother, not even my closest amazing friends, for fear of confrontation, fighting and making a scene. I always HATED big yelling confrontations and I was afraid of the contempt or disgust I thought everyone would have for me. By that time I was hating myself and thinking about just committing suicide to escape it all. He didn’t want me having friends that were guys apart from him; even girls were a no go. The only thing that I could escape into was WoW and computer games.

In WoW, I met a close friend. When I was asking anyone and everyone in all chat if I could get a run through a dungeon, dartamoor, a lvl 70 warrior volunteered. His reason: I’d asked nicely! After that he helped me level up to 70 and then we’d do every dungeon and quest together. When things got tough for him or anyone in our guild, we’d all help out. The guild he started turned into a great group of friends from all over in all situations. We’d help each other out, and it didn’t matter if you hadn’t been online in ages, they’d say hello and get right back into questing with you. They gave me back my self-confidence and feeling of self worth. I got myself out of that depressing relationship, got back on good terms with my family and got my grades back up again.

Now I’m at university and life is great. I have a great bf and I get along with my parents and brother, I still play lots of computer games like League of Legends, Counter Strike Source and Kingdom Hearts games, and I believe I always will. I don’t play WoW anymore as I just don’t have the money for it, but I’ll always remember those times playing WoW with those friends with a smile and happy memories. I know that it was because of those people that I got through those 2 years (thanks guys)!

Do I blame the ex for how he acted and what I went through? yes and no, yes because he should of known better than to do what he did, and no because not everyone can cope through a loss like that or deal with it in a good way. I just don’t feel anything at all for him; not anger, not hate, not pity, not anything. I do hope that he’s a better person now than he was then, but I don’t really care to know.